megfowler.com

February 8, 2008

friday love list: oh, the shame!

Filed under: love, listy — meg @ 4:27 pm

(This week’s Love List theme was suggested by my lovely roommate, Catherine, who has absolutely no shameful loves whatsoever. NOT.)

Hello!

It’s Friday!

It’s not raining!

That’s a lot to be thankful for, right there.

That’s why this week’s love list will be SO FULL OF LOVE THAT YOU JUST CAN’T HELP BUT LOVE IN RESPONSE.

But it won’t be a normal love list… no. In fact, it might make you feel a little… awkward.

This week’s love list will be based on the themes explored here and here. Need to get inspired? The comments on those posts are MAGIC.

That’s right… it’s time to haul the skeletons out of your closet and discover your innate capacity to embarrass yourself in public spheres.

Oh, wait… is that just me?

Sigh.

Without further ado, here’s an Insta-Rorshach of my personal shame spiral (And as always, feel free to do your own in comments, or post one at your blog… and no being mean about anyone else’s shame! Only good-natured ribbing will be accepted!):

SHAMEFUL THINGS I LOVE:

McDonald’s french fries (and milkshakes, and… oh, screw it… chicken mcnuggets and cheeseburgers and the McDonaldland cookies that are soooo good if you dip them in the triple-thick chocolate milkshake… ooooh)

CNN coverage of many, many embarrassing things

Watching the Weather Network Highway Conditions obsessively, waiting to see the red “Closed” locations

Long drink orders at Starbucks

Most fashion magazines I can get my hands on (InStyle, Vogue, Elle, Allure, Marie Claire, W… sigh)

Assorted other trashy hits by: Christina Aguilera, Color Me Badd (ack!), Rob Base and DJ EZ Rock, Kenny Loggins, Def Leppard, Kylie Minogue, ABBA, Jackson 5 and KISS… and so many more

Dancing around my house like Tom Cruise in Risky Business

Online IQ/Meyers-Briggs/etc. tests that really don’t tell you anything useful

The Real Housewives of Orange County
(my father will be horrified)

Velour hoodies

Cherry Kool-Aid

True crime shows like 48 Hours Mystery and American Justice

Reruns of So You Think You Can Dance (never current… and only in the afternoons, in my pajamas)

Certain songs by the following boy bands and boy band breakout stars (ironic term alert!): Backstreet Boys (6 songs), N’Sync (10 songs), Jordan Knight (1 song), Justin Timberlake (2 albums!)

Those blue/red/white rocket popsicles

Emerald green eyeshadow

Smelling like a fabric softener sheet

Smelling like a cookie

Wearing yoga pants out of the house

Smelling like a mango

Kraft Dinner

Giggly texting fun

Sparkly lotion on the shoulders

Giant sunglasses

Chef Boyardee Mini Ravioli

Donettes (no, I’m not misspelling donuts… check it out)

$7 Old Navy tank tops in EVERY COLOUR IMAGINABLE! (I pretty much end up wearing one daily)

Hawaiian Tropic ANYTHING (except the bikini contest… echhh)

Too Faced Extreme Lip Injection (yes, I set my lips on fire daily)

Tater Tots

Slurpees

Wendy’s Frosty drinks

Chewing bubble gum and making GIANT bubbles

The following actors… and not because of the movies they make or EVEN SAYING A WORD: Ryan Reynolds, Jonathan Bennett, Gabriel Macht, Ryan Gosling… just to name a few.

And… uh… you?

January 25, 2008

friday love list: BECAUSE WE CAN DO IT BETTER THAN OPRAH.

Filed under: love, listy — meg @ 9:42 am


One of my posts is currently up for a Canadian Blog Award. Want to vote? Head here. And vote for Best Personal Blog here.

Every Friday for months and months (well, almost every Friday, but consistency is boring, no? No? Okay, fine. MAKE ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MYSELF) I’ve put up a Love List here, and you’ve been gracious enough to respond by posting Love Lists on your blogs or including your Love Lists in the comments.

And it’s awesome. Because LOVE IS AWESOME.

Which apparently Oprah now knows, since the big headline on her new issue of ‘O Magazine’ is LOVE LIST.

Did she rip it off from me? No. Of course she didn’t. Although her company IP has been in my referrers more than once.

STILL.

HEY.

MINE.

That means that today, we must do the MOST LOVING LIST OF ALL!

Which means we’re not dealing with stuff you love right now… no. Not stuff you loved last week. Or stuff you might love next week. Or stuff you kind of like a lot and it might turn into love but you’re just coming out of something and you’re not totally ready?

WHATEVER.

We’re dealing with THE STUFF YOU LOVE MOST. THE MOST LOVING STUFF. THE ULTI-LOVE. THE LOVE THAT ATE **INSERT YOUR CITY NAME HERE**.

And with that much love, can Oprah possibly out do us? I DON’T THINK SO.

THINGS I LOVE MOST AND BEST AND WHOA! THE LOVE OVERWHELMS ME!

My mom and dad, married for almost 38 years
My big brother who really IS bigger… like, almost a foot!
All my amazing and talented and gorgeous friends, all of whom show great patience in putting up with me, especially the one that lives with me day in and day out
Sunsets by the ocean
Hockey
Moonlight
Being high up in the mountains
Football playoffs
Sushi
Laughing so hard you can’t breathe or stand up straight
“Modern” design
Penguins
Big, soft chairs that fit two people
Worn-in leather with that perfect, smooth patina
Old alarm and wall clocks
Cashmere
Old-school oxford cloth shirts
The sound of waves crashing
Sand between my toes
My fireplace
Falling asleep on the phone
Sundresses
People with rich, deep laughs
Road trips
Roller coasters
Dark wood floors
Snowy days
Lemons
BBQ grilling
Paul Newman
Hoop earrings
Imperfect smiles
Perfect ballet flats
Hugging
Grace
David Letterman
Christmas lights
San Diego, CA (and Eric)
Encouraging people
Debating stuff and things
Soul music. And music in general.
Babies
Dark jeans
Potatoes
Live theatre and music
Horn-rimmed glasses
Four blankets, window open, -10 C
Sleeping in
Martin, my iBook, and my future MacBook Pro, Oliver (joining Toby and Rory and Quinn, iPods past and present)
Small pandas
Blue skies
Hot wings with bleu cheese dip
Watching CNN coverage of big things AS IT HAPPENS (I know, I know…)
That sticky-uppy man hair with the bit of product… so cute!
Blogging (really, can you tell?)
Lattes
Sephora
Club seats at sporting events
Magazines… non-fiction reading in general, actually
Foot rubs (ahhhhh…)
White sheets
Flipflops
Sophia Loren’s style
Big sunglasses (not Elton John-esque, more Audrey Hepburn)
Witty boys
Musician boys (apparently, pianists, guitarists and drummers…)
Intellectual boys
Boys who wear their pants the right length
Boys who can say, “I love you” without freaking out
Dancing for hours and hours
Cooking for parties
Down duvets… bigger the better
You

AND WHAT DO YOU LOVE MOST? Blog it, comment it, but DO IT TODAY. We gotta out-love the Big O.

Well, not that Big O… oh, you know what I mean. Yeesh.

LOVE!

January 23, 2008

seven awkward things i have done in the last 24 hours.

Filed under: random, listy — meg @ 8:34 am

1. Was attacked by a bus door that grabbed my coat sleeve and held me hostage for two stops.
2. Tossed my phone at a man in an elevator because I pulled it from my purse with such gusto.
3. Bumped my own arm while using burny lip gloss, thus creating a burny stripe across my cheek.
4. Dropped half a bottle of Advil into my coffee (no, I didn’t drink it.)
5. Put a Slinky on my arm as a bracelet, but neglected to remove it before running to the store for something.
6. Was listening to WHAM! on my iPod Touch when an attractive man leaned over to check it out.
7. Existed.

January 20, 2008

five reasons playoff football is better than dating.

Filed under: random, listy — meg @ 5:45 pm

1. If some idiot in tight pants approaches you, you get to knock his ass flat.
2. There’s a penalty for Offensive Holding.
3. Getting shut down? Just call an audible.
4. There’s an actual possibility of Too Many Men On The Field.
5. Three words: Backfield in motion.

friday — err, sunday — love list: and with this, we attempt to leave behind a) long term mood of encroaching grrr; b) no, that about covers it.

Filed under: love, listy — meg @ 1:11 pm

(To see more love lists, just click “listy” to your right. You’ll get more lists than that, but WHO DOESN’T LOVE LISTS?)

As you’ve read (or not read, really… it’s okay either way), I’ve been a little locomotive chuggin’ down the grrr track for more than a week now. I’d attribute that partly to health stuff and partly to I HAVE NO IDEA.

I can only drag so long before I start to wear down, though. And I don’t really see that as an option.

So — since I’m sitting by my fireplace watching the Pats play in their championship and I’ve got good coffee and I’m going to make brunch and that’s pretty awesome and I should really be thankful no matter how much Advil is in my system — here’s a love list to put the screws to a crappy time.

A crappy time I am leaving behind.

As always, feel free to leave your own in the comments or post one on your blog. But make sure you include a little love in your weekend, no matter what else you do.

THINGS I LOVE

Listening to XM radio ’70’s Radio) with my parents and trying to guess the songs before the chorus hits (I was 6 when the 70’s ended)
Tom Brady
Fabric softener
Peanut butter cups!
My super-soft brown chair and a half
Playoff football
Maple bacon (mmm….)
Other texting addicts
David Letterman
SEPHORA!
Rainless days in Vancouver — especially the cold, clear kind
My mom and dad
Potential vacation plans
Corn muffins
Phil Simms
48 Hours Mystery
My new hat (see above)
My Aquiesse Grapefruit-Basil candle
Patience
Political coverage, as long as I can watch it with people who don’t hate politics
Firm huggers
Sleeping in
Boys at ease in their own skin
Peonies
Crazy laughers
Barry White song intros
Hoop earrings
Advil Liqui-Gels Extra Strength
Mentally buying things from the Pottery Barn catalog
The tiny birds in our tiny bird tree
Clementines
Al Green
Onion rings
Doing faux ballet moves around the house like a dork

AND YOU??

January 11, 2008

friday crabby list: not what you expected but roll with it if you don’t want me to pinch you.

Filed under: stuff, angsty, listy — meg @ 3:39 pm

I know.

THIS IS NOT PROTOCOL.

This is supposed to be a love list!

But folks… I gotta be honest. I just don’t have it in me today.

I realize that the love list is to help me and everyone else shake off any bleah/whiny/snarly/crabby attitude before the weekend hits. I suppose I should really persist against the forces of MEH that are holding me back and fight the good fight.

After all, I’m a lucky and blessed girl.

Then again, I’m also allowed to have crap days now and then.

That’s why I think I’m going to do something a little different and clear my decks of all the crabbies by being… well… crabby. And never using the term “crabbies” again. Ew.

Seriously. Ew.

Ahem.

So without further explanation — because, really, it’s FINE — the Crabby List.

THINGS IRKING ME

Automated response phone systems that sound like really smarmy people you would not hang out with, had you any choice in the matter. People who say “Sorry about that.” when you refuse their suggestion of “Did you say you want to connect to Monkey Tuna?”

Seinfeld quoters

The valley in the middle of my bed that claims me every night WHOOSH!

The fluorescent-bulb like pastiness of my face

People who call someone who is larger than a size 6 “full-figured”. Oh yeah? I call you “full-idiot”

People who don’t stop at crosswalks, ESPECIALLY in the rain because HOW IMPORTANT IS YOUR SCHEDULE, NO I INSIST YOU GO FIRST AND I DIDN’T NEED THAT LIMB, NO WORRIES!

Constant toe-stubbing

Reality television in general

How quickly organic produce fails. As my roommate once said, the bananas are like “HI EAT ME EAT ME! Oh, too late.”

Too-short pants

Last night’s bus driver, who was so startlingly rude that he almost killed my I JUST SAW ELVIS COSTELLO IN WHOLE FOODS OMG buzz (not quite, though.)

People who obsess more than I do about finding me “that special someone.” Stop! How do you know what I think is special? Yoinks.

How ALL air fresheners smell like someone’s grandma bathed in Lysol and apple juice.

The rip in my jeans. Drafty!

That itchy spot on my back I can’t reach because of my short flipper arms. And while I’m at it, short arms. Flailflailflail.

People who obsess about Britney Spears and perpetuate the drama by not taking their eyes off the whole thing. As soon as the media stops creating their own tragedies and then “wondering what went wrong” maybe I’ll be able to take them seriously. Nah, that’s not gonna happen either.

The price of the damn shoes.

“Pap” as an abbreviation for “paparazzi”. Eeek. Couldn’t you do “razzi” or something?

People who hate Top 40 just to be cool.

My own annoying weirdness about getting my hair cut. Who cares? It’s just hair! You are not a supermodel! Few people will even notice. Get ye a grip!

Larry King. Always. Forever. Dear mercy. Suspenders SNAP SNAP!

The really cold, bucketesque rain that falls when I’m just trying to get somewhere and look like something other than a wet kitten.

Hormones. Enough said. Grrrr.

Fall Out Boy

People who say, “Must be nice” whenever something good happens to you. WELL, YES, THANKS. IT IS.

Anything used to measure popularity on the Internet. You’ll see why next week. Sigh.

Gummi candies that have gone rock-hard.

Most chatspeak abbreviations, especially used by those over the age of 30. And if you’re over 40, we should really chat. And not like this: LOL UR BN SO MEAN.

***

And you?

I recommend you not follow my path and choose a Love List instead, as I normally would.

But if you gotta vent… go right ahead.

January 6, 2008

well, since someone else is probably considering nuclear fission and amatory fiction, i can probably just think about whatever.

Filed under: think, listy — meg @ 11:45 pm

I’m one of those people.

You know the ones.

The tossy-turny, rollovery, hmm I was just thinking-y, woo-it’s-warm-in-here, maybe-I-need-a-glass-of-milk-y, are-you-sleeping-already, I’m-not-ready-for-Monday-y, late-night-revelation-y, well… people.

When I climb into bed at night, my brain rumbles into overdrive, and I’m left lying awake until 2 am pondering the universe and world economics and old Magnum P.I. plotlines.

It’s much worse on Sunday nights, too.

I guess I’m mentally preparing for the week ahead, but not by making lists or setting out my agenda or doing anything rational. No, I’m just boggling at life. And not necessarily important aspects of life, either.

Like, only moments ago, trying to remember the names of the Hanson brothers (no, not the band. From Slapshot.)

For hours.

People make all sorts of suggestions as to how I could slow things down in my agitated brain/heart/soul: prayer, essential oils on my pillow, yoga, sleep breathing, sleep hygiene, herbal remedies, prescription drugs… you name it.

I suppose some of them might have an impact. But this has been the Nature of Meg since I was two years old and yelling, “HEY, WHAT YOU GUYS DOING IN THERE” through the wall when I was supposed to be a sleeping cherub in my crib.

Can it be cured? Hard to say.

I’ve never been a cherub.

More of a town crier.

And that’s fine, I think.

Except that I have nowhere to PUT all this stuff. I just have to let it juggle around in my psyche until I finally wear myself out or experience the cosmic release valve that is Morning Coffee.

So.

Want some?

For you, the last 15 things I thought about. Feel free to think about them, too, or just marvel at the fact that I’d do this instead of ZZZZZ…

1. If my love of fabric softener is leaving a buildup on the fibres of my clothes (well, okay, I already know it is, I’m just thinking about how I should STOP THAT.)

2. Why soda is always “lemon-lime” and not just “lemon” or “lime.”

3. How people actually make it through an episode of Survivor without wanting to send Mark Burnett a bill for their time.

4. Haircut or new boots? Haircut or new boots? Haircut or new boots?

5. Why the “vibrate” setting on my phone is so violent my roommate can hear it rattling on my bedside table through the wall when I get late-night texts (and this is a girl who can sleep through Eric and I debating about U.S. politics and Cirque de Soleil from three feet away.)

6. Why sometimes my bed is so incredibly comfy, and sometimes it makes my back ache.

7. How anyone convinces themselves that the way to get people to agree with their ideas is to belittle everyone else’s ideas mercilessly.

8. Why it is that I radically prefer non-fiction writing to fiction writing, even with a Lit degree under my belt (or hoop skirt, as it were.)

9. What the purpose is behind junebugs, the Electoral College, Dr. Phil, the return of legwarmers, or Dancing with the Stars.

10. If I put my charitable dollars in the right places this past year.

11. How to very quickly master the art of baking bread, with as few failed loaves as possible.

12. What I *really* want in a lifemate.

13. Which city I will end up moving to, when I eventually move. Which I think I will. One day.

14. How one can learn to excel at following diagrammatic instruction.

15. What it will take for me to become a better friend.

And you?

January 4, 2008

friday love list: a fresh new lovin’ year!

Filed under: love, listy — meg @ 12:04 pm

(for more love lists, just click “listy” or “love” to your right!)

That’s right, my chickens!

WE GOT OURSELVES A WHOLE NEW YEAR TO LOVE ON!

And that’s exactly what I intend to do.

I know that none of us feels loving or loved all the time, but sometimes forcing yourself to think through the things you enjoy/are passionate about/get the tingles for is a good way to pull yourself through the muck. A small step, but an important one.

But instead of focusing on the new year yet, I’m going to ask YOU to tell me what you loved LAST year.

That’s right! Interactivity! Which is to the Internet what Nerf toys are to safe violence.

And I’ll answer in comments as well.

Note: the things you loved in 2007 didn’t have to be invented/created/released in 2007. You just had to enjoy them last year.

GO!

THINGS OF LOVE FROM 2007

Movie of Love:

Song of Love:

Book of Love:

Album of Love:

Place of Love:

Month of Love:

Best Day of Love:

Best Moment of Love:

Word of Love:

Purchase of Love:

City of Love:

Food of Love:

Beverage of Love:

Person of Love (someone who made a difference for you this year):

Spot of Love (the best place to go to just be):

Clothing Item of Love:

Random Thing of Love (anything you want):

DO SHARE! And then post it or comment it.

January 2, 2008

welcome back to work, y’all. and holy crap.

Filed under: love, questions, listy — meg @ 9:25 am

I’m sorry, but is anyone else like WHOA WAS THAT THE HOLIDAYS I THINK I SNEEZED.

It just blitzed on by like a freight train and here I am at work and whew.

I have a new iPod. Christmas MUST have happened. Either that or I stole it, and if that’s the case, 2008 is just going to end up a complicated web of crime.

Which kind of sounds a little more razzamatazz (shut up, it’s a word) than my 2007.

So, to celebrate these “supposed” holidays, I’d like to give you a quick list, and a question…

THINGS I INTEND TO KEEP DOING IN 2008, I DON’T EVEN CARE

1. Drinking too much coffee.
2. Taking my laptop to bed (IT’S NOT LIKE IT’S ANNOYING ANYONE EXCEPT MR. PILLOW MY IMAGINARY BOYFRIEND I HUG WHO IS ACTUALLY JUST MY PILLOW BUT STOP JUDGING)
3. Not wearing correct footwear (nor corrective footwear, for that matter)
4. Playing the same songs over and over again on my iPod
5. Doing laundry almost every day
6. Continuing to smell like a cookie
7. Smiling without teeth until people force me to grin
8. Swearing at hockey games
9. Obsessing about produce
10. Perfecting the art of the momentary crush

So what aren’t YOU changing in 2008?

And why am I so shouty?

Ah well. On my sixth shot of espresso this am. Bliss.

December 28, 2007

friday love list: pathetic, pathetic girl edition

Filed under: love, listy — meg @ 9:36 am

Oh, chilluns.

I’m sick.

Well, I’m getting there, at least.

I’m pretty sure this isn’t as bad as it will get. Not because I’m a pessimist, mind you — I AM THE LOVE LIST GIRL, YOU WILL REMEMBER — but because I know my body, and the radical congestion/chills/headache/fever combo is strangely reminiscent of… well… the beginning of the end.

Meh.

Tonight, my parents are coming to get me to take me back to the cozy cottage before a day trip tomorrow, so I’ll be free to be (you and me?) whiny and pathetic with my mom, and it will be AWESOME.

I’m sure she’s excited. (cough)

UPDATE: Cancelled. My mom’s back is out. Aren’t we an awesome pair? THINK GOOD THOUGHTS ABOUT MY MOM’S BACK.

I’m going to push through today like a trooper, though, all wrapped up in a pashmina, contributing to deforestation with rampant Kleenex usage, and pretending that espresso has healing properties like, say…aloe.

THE ALOE OF THE SOUL.

AND — to help me not be a complete toad to the world around me — I’m writing a love list. Not my ULTIMATE END OF YEAR LOVE LIST WHOA (that’s coming), but just a list of things that would really make me happy at this specific moment. A freestyler, if you will.

Feel free to be rampantly loving on your own blog or in comments. Also, please make me a smoothie.

THINGS I LOVE

My mom’s baking powder biscuits
Kleenex with lotion
Possibilities
People who know more about stuff than I do and then tell me about it
Snowy mountains
The same arguments my parents always have about a) traffic b) when to leave the house c) how much my dad complains about both things
Clapping when I’m happy
IRA GLASS I LOVE YOU
A really good bra
Two-quilts-window-open
Listening to the same song over and over
Limes
Ben and Jerry’s New York Super Fudge Chunk
Genmaicha tea
Memories of being much more naive
Hot, hot showers
Hugging TIGHT
Endless pictures taken of sunsets
Quietly witty people who also happen to laugh loud
Bare feet
Lemonade
Baseball caps
My perfume
My Boots No. 7 Serum (Thanks, Eric. You are the Drugstore Cowboy.)
Giant earrings
Debating
Jeans that are perfectly worn in
Non-monsoon Vancouver mornings
Encouragers
Being overwhelmed by how much you love someone
Ponytails
Yam fries
Hockey (Oh, how you make everything okay)
All things Apple
Temporary crushes
Men in glasses
Sara Bareilles
Singing so loud you go hoarse (not too hard right now)
Really strong gingerale
Poached eggs
MAC Plushglass in Posh It Up
Soul singers

AND YOU?

Come on. Do it for my immune system.

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