the best thing about today, and any OTHER day, too.
My parents were married 39 years ago today.
It’s crazy to imagine spending that much time with ANYONE… seeing as I’ve only been on the planet for 34 years.
Heck, they’ve been hanging out together longer than I’ve been doing anything.
And they love each other, which is a rare thing these days.
And they are best friends, which is a rare thing these days.
And they talk about everything, and know everything about one another, which is a rare thing these days.
And they are committed to forever… which is the rarest thing of all.
They haven’t been able to afford crazy getaways, or giant romantic gestures, or expensive dinners out, or lavish gifts at any point in their marriage, because they’ve chosen to do things with their lives that pay out more in joy and peace than in cash. I don’t think they see those things as the key to a great relationship, anyway.
But they do have their things: little trips to Cannon Beach, OR; their shared ice cream moments; their day-off drives; their rarer but always memorable gift-giving moments; their phone calls when either of them isn’t at home, just to check in; their reputation for being the most solid couple in any group of friends they’ve ever had; and their devoted love for their kids.
When my brother married my sister-in-law, Carey, I remember saying in my “Welcome to the Family!” toast that — in addition to a great husband — she had lucked into an amazing set of parents.
I can’t think of two people who are more concerned for the happiness and well-being of the people they’ve brought into this world… and the people those people choose to be with.
When I introduced them to Gradon this Christmas — even though we’re neither married, nor engaged — he became another one of their kids. They got him a birthday present. They celebrated when he got a new job. Heck, he is wearing a scarf my mom made for him as I type this, on the chilly streets of Boston, 3,000 miles away.
And it’s not because they’re desperate to get me “married off”, or anything like that (though I know they’ll be happy when that happens.)
They’re just quick to love. Generous with their love. Open with their love.
They do it with everyone.
Especially one another.
I won’t pretend that they haven’t had to face a ton of challenges together, or that they never squabble. Because they DO squabble. That’s inevitable, I think. I am always a little suspicious of couples who claim they never argue or disagree on anything. Stuff is going to come up.
But that stuff is such a small part of who they are.
The rest of their lives together shows them to be loving, wise, thoughtful, silly, sassy, chatty, fierce, gracious, crazy and seriously, seriously hilarious.
I love you, Mom and Dad.
Thank you for loving one another, and showing me the best example of true devotion I have ever seen. Thank you for putting one another first, and making your relationship a priority. Thank you for giving me a foundation to build my life on, and huge doses of grace every step of the way. Thank you for accepting the person I care about, and for supporting us in our plans and hopes.
May this next year bring you more of all the good things you love, and much less of what you don’t. May you be healthy, happy, safe and secure.
And may I continue to learn from you what love really looks like. Not red hearts and chocolates and roses love. Real love. True love.
Love that lasts at LEAST 39 years.
xoxox,
Meg
February 14th, 2009 at 10:39 am
Totally made me cry. That’s really great, Meg.
February 14th, 2009 at 11:26 am
I don’t even know your parents but I think I have a crush on them. :)
February 14th, 2009 at 1:28 pm
Happy Anniversary, Meg’s Parents!
February 14th, 2009 at 3:48 pm
Meg, having the privilege of knowing your parents, and having experienced their kindness over the years, I can vouch for all you’ve written. I haven’t seen them in a long time, and now I miss them terribly after reading this! I should phone and say hi…
February 14th, 2009 at 8:19 pm
At least.
This is beautiful, Meg. Happy anniversary to your folks.
February 14th, 2009 at 11:21 pm
Hokey Dina - now on top of being all verklempt(sp?) over the post, - I’m missing Kim as well!
February 15th, 2009 at 1:59 am
Great post, Meg.
My new lady friend and I shared Valentine’s Day a little differently than some, I guess - we took her parents (who got married on V Day 66 years ago) out for dinner; love that lasts thatlong is truly a wonderful thing.
Hope you had a good day too.
:-)
February 15th, 2009 at 8:16 pm
I hope to be those parents for our girls. Beautiful, Meg.
February 15th, 2009 at 8:20 pm
This is a story that truly inspires. Thanks for writing and sharing it with us.
When my wife and I grow up we want to be just like your mom and dad. We can only hope our daughter remembers us to others so full of love then as you do yours now.
February 15th, 2009 at 8:24 pm
It is so nice to hear a story like this and feel inspired… I read it and a couple things come to mind right away. Sound like your parents have a deep respect for each other, which goes hand in hand in importance with love, if you ask me. Second, seems like they put as much goodness into raising their family as they did into having a solid relationship, which is why your words on a website exude love and respect for your parents. Big, big congratulations to Meg’s Mom & Dad.
February 15th, 2009 at 8:30 pm
Your parents are a gift. Thank you for sharing them with us. Give them all my best wishes for the next 40!
February 15th, 2009 at 9:46 pm
Mazal Tov to your parents! They sound like wonderful people and it’s inspiring to see how their marriage has thrived!
Happy Anniversary, Meg’s Parents :-)
February 16th, 2009 at 1:47 pm
Forget the candy. Forget the flowers. It’s stories like this that give me butterflies and make me believe in love. Thanks.
February 16th, 2009 at 7:26 pm
What a beautiful tribute. I sure do want my kids to feel that way in another 30 years about myself and my wife.
Inspired.
February 20th, 2009 at 12:05 am
just read you heart felt post annd was pleased to hear that from many different perspectives - i have been doing a doc on my mother so her great grand children will know her - and thats the title too you can see some pics of my mother who is 96 and when i asked her last year how old she felt inside she said “not yet born yet” you might want to do a little audio photo moving still image on your parents too - vizualpoetry.com/mom
food for imagination
keep dreaming
geogeller
February 28th, 2009 at 3:40 pm
Did you share this with your parents? I imagine they’d love reading what you wrote about them. What a sweet, sweet sharing.