only two m & m colors will do, and can someone pre-crack the candy shell in advance? dentist’s orders!
Many celebrities have them.
They are frequently ridiculous, often expensive, and in some cases?
Now, I’m not a celebrity or anything remotely LIKE a celebrity or even on the CUSP of celebrity, but I was thinking today… if I had a rider, what would be on it?
What kind of random things would I think to include?
Would I have specific settings for the thermostat? Would I choose the scents of my (soy and beeswax only) candles to reflect my mood? Would I demand a certain variety of cold cut, or a giant bowl of Jolly Ranchers (citrus varieties, please)?
Actually, I doubt I’d do any of it. But it’s fun to imagine.
What would be on YOUR rider?
Tell us in the comments….
December 8th, 2008 at 4:22 pm
I would demand entire pots of Dunkin Donuts coffee. Not to drink, of course, but to pour out while I laugh maniacally.
Sure, I’d be financially supporting a company whose product I can’t stand. But if DD was to someday go away, what gigantic, disgusting coffee would I have to despise?
December 8th, 2008 at 4:44 pm
This is harder than I thought it would be - I set out going ‘let’s be witty and creative’ and now I just want to figure this out for real. basically what would I have in my ideal room?
Right…
Event Organisers take note, Editor of The Phrygian Cap must have available:
Suite of three rooms including kitchenette, to include recipe to Meg’s famous marinade, plus bathroom fitted with rainforest shower or triple head rose. Main lounge is to be furnished with: one leather two seater (chocolate) two leather wingback armchairs (colours optional) Assorted poufs and cushions (provide ample for 15-20 groupies (various sizes)) 100 sheets of watercolour paper (300gsm) ink, fountain pens, quills, pencils. Low square coffee table (w/Huge fruit basket - ensure 6kilos of grapes) Giant beach ball (6′ diameter)… Parrot + 5′ stand (must be pretrained to recite Coleridge) 3 Treasure Chests filled with M&Ms …..
I think I’d better stop here actually.
December 8th, 2008 at 5:40 pm
Oooh Fun! Hmmm, my rider would include several types of cheese, a litter of puppies to nuzzle, and steel drums. Played by Joseph Fiennes.
December 8th, 2008 at 8:19 pm
That diamond cream from Arrested Development. I want to encrust myself in diamonds each night, then rinse it all down the drain and start over.
Oh and Bear Naked Peak Protein Granola.
December 9th, 2008 at 1:56 pm
one time we asked for only green m&m’s on our rider as a joke. didn’t happen.
in a dream world: vegan deli slices, an organic soda - served with a plum in a man’s hat, 4 bottles of mojave red beer, 4 shots of burbon, and just for kicks: inordinate amounts of puppies… to be returned after the show, to their rightful owners.
best rider so far: case of beer, unlimited jack daniels and wack of food.
December 9th, 2008 at 1:56 pm
A large amount of Candy Corn everywhere, in 4 flavors, regular, coca cola, chocolate and root beer.
Good luck finding them.
December 9th, 2008 at 1:57 pm
white tulips (ONLY white)
white, all-organic cotton towels
cashmere throws
vodka x 10
wine x 10
lots of cheese
kittens (at least 3)
masseur (male)
votive candles (no artificial scents)
caviar (beluga or sevruga only)
December 9th, 2008 at 1:59 pm
I’m so boring. A selection of silk boxer shorts would be required. A pair of mute Barbie-like attendants in matching bikinis would be nice, too.
December 9th, 2008 at 2:12 pm
wifi, baked lays, coke zero, peanut m&m’s, brie, some sort of topiary, a big fluffy chair, Ben & Jerry’s cookie dough ice cream, chicken fingers, scrabble, Sliver Oak Cabernet Sauvignon (97 of course), bottle of Saracco, appropriate glasses for the afore mentioned booze, a record player and assorted jazz standard type records (Frank, Dino, and the like), all 7 Harry Potter books (the UK editions), fluffy socks, and the comics section of the local newspaper.
December 9th, 2008 at 2:47 pm
I’d ask for one of those fancy Egyptian Pharaoh couches placed in the center of a red-shagg-carpeted room.
Beads hanging everywhere.
Pharaoh servants in shiny gold outfits; one with a palm tree “waffter” to keep a cool breeze flowing over me, and the other 5 standing by with large baskets filled with fresh fruit.
As I’m waiting to make my appearance…the super sexy servants (with fruit baskets) drop grapes in my mouth upon request.
I’d also ask for a huge refrigerated beverage cart outside my dressing room door - filled with my favorite alcoholic & non-alcoholic beverages, of course.
And huge security guards everywhere…with dark sunglasses & ear pieces.
That’s it.
December 9th, 2008 at 6:50 pm
I’d ask for Barack Obama to be there to keep me company. Some Pepsi One, honey roasted peanut butter, and ripe bananas would be lovely too, but the President -elect (I cannot get enough saying it) would suffice!!!
December 9th, 2008 at 6:58 pm
My rider would include :
* Fresh white freesia everywhere
* Kai room fragrance (http://www.planetbeauty.com/brands/Kai/)
* White Candela’s
* Soft as silk waffle weave towels in a sparkling clean bathroom
* Chocolate leather loveseats and couches and ottomans
* Woodburning fireplace
* In-N-Out Burgers
* Crushed ice
* Coke/jager/Vodka/RedBull
* Wine for my friends
* Soft ambient lighting
* Free wifi
* Apple TV
* Bose sound system
* 13 of my closest friends
December 9th, 2008 at 9:58 pm
- Private Suite. Decorated by Sarah Richardson.
- Fluffy bed with all-white best quality linens.
- Cable TV.
- The following DVDs: The Fifth Element, Pride and Prejudice, Volver, Return to Oz, all 6 Star Wars movies, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, all Harry Potter movies.
- All C.S. Lewis titles.
- High speed internet.
- Starbucks available at all times: Alto, Vanilla-Sugar free, Skim milk.
- “Dulce de Leche” ice cream.
- French fries.
- Variety of Sushi (only Ponzu sauce).
- Penne Arrabiata.
- Brie cheese and wheat crackers. Best quality.
- Assorted chips.
- Mundet Light (it’s a Mexican free-calorie apple soda… I don’t like the regular because it’s just too sweet)
- Water bottles. e pura brand.
- Phone line with only outgoing calls (will charge a 5000 dollar fee for every incoming call to whoever is giving me all of the above. Got that tip from Britney! So nice of her to share)
This was so much fun!
December 12th, 2008 at 2:31 pm
= The best meatball and pepperoni pizza your city can produce.
= The best enchiladas your city can produce.
= Diet Dr Pepper
= Espresso Martinis
= Liz Hurley in any of the outfits she wore in Bedazzled to help me eat the above.
Easy.
December 12th, 2008 at 4:21 pm
Hmm… I am sure after living with me, you could guess like 98% of these before I write them, but I’ll share anyway:
1: A big soft terry cloth bath robe.
2: Lots of fluffy white towels.
3: Sour Cream and Onion Ruffles chips (lots)
4: Hint o’line Tostitos chips (lots)
5: California Baja Starburst (lots)
6: the purple bag of skittles (lots)
7: Glossette raisins. (lots)
8: Mint Aero (lots)
9: ritz crackers with goat cheese (unlimited)
10: graham crackers with cheddar cheese (unlimited)
11: seedless green grapes
12: vanilla yogurt
13: lots of vanilla scented candles
14: Personal masseuse
15: Fireplace
16: Perfect sheets and a big duvet