choose ye: celebrity edition!

(Remember — no “it depends” or “both!” or “neither”… you must choose!)

Robert Redford or Paul Newman?

Bill Murray or Steve Martin?

Fred Astaire or Gene Kelly?

Elvis Costello or Elvis Presley?

George Clooney or Brad Pitt?

Ella Fitzgerald or Billie Holiday?

Garrison Keillor or David Sedaris?

Stevie Wonder or Al Green?

Sophia Loren or Marilyn Monroe?

Lawrence Welk or Percy Faith?

Miles Davis or John Coltrane?

Tina Fey or Sarah Silverman?

Denzel Washington or Russell Crowe?

Ron Popeil (of SET IT AND FORGET IT fame) or Billy Mays (OXY CLEAN!)

John Cusack or Matthew Broderick?

Benicio Del Toro or Javier Bardem?

Robert DeNiro or Al Pacino?

Grace Kelly or Audrey Hepburn?

Jimmy Stewart or Cary Grant?

Bob or Doug?

Julia Roberts or Reese Witherspoon?

Roger Moore or Sean Connery?

Salma Hayek or Penelope Cruz?

Matt Damon or Ben Affleck?

Lucille Ball or Carol Burnett?

wednesday morning commute: fish edition.

My lovely roommate and best friend Catherine “commutes” with me on Wednesday mornings, since she works the early shift that day and I… well, I work early every day.

Sigh.

I ride in her car until she’s almost at work, then I hop off and catch a bus the rest of the way.

Two things you need to know:

1. Catherine is not a morning person. At all. By any stretch of the imagination.
2. I am an all-day person.

What this means:

1. I can talk coherently from pretty much the first second I’m awake (nanny and camp counselor represent!)
2. Catherine is not yet ready to understand anything I’m saying.

Which is what led to our conversation this morning:

Meg: Apparently, Buzz and Jen and their baby got some bad fish yesterday. They were sick all day.

Cat (with notable disdain): What is a batfish?

Meg: BAD fish. You know, like tainted?

(At this point, laughter ensues for MILES. Stomach-pain-causing, mascara-ruining laughter. Finally, I get out the question.)

Meg: What did you think a batfish was?

Cat: You know… like you can have silverfish. You know silverfish? Isn’t that a thing you get?

Meg: In your house, yeah. Like bugs?

Cat:
Oh… ?

(More laughter ensues for miles and miles…)

Meg: But a batfish? What would that even look like? What would that even BE?

Cat:
Well, they have catfish, don’t they? That rhymes!

And now you know why I love her so.