anarchy in the m.f.
It’s not that I don’t love love.
I just love it EVERY DAY OF THE YEAR, rather than just the one. You know?
So, continuing last year’s tradition…
THINGS I HATE
Carnations
Constant snifflers
The term “smackdown”
Patchouli
“Pat pat pat” hugs
Banana-flavoured gum
Red-eye in photos
Black licorice
Margarine on popcorn
Sketchy dried-out baked goods in coffee shops
Anything ending in “Gone Wild”
The smell of burnt hair
The term “snark”
Too-short pants on men
The price of women’s shoes
When people believe everything they read on the Internet is true
The term “baby bump”
The absence of wifi
Greeting cards that make noise
Outlets that are too loose to hold the damn plug ESPECIALLY WHEN I AM VACUUMING
Reality TV that “doesn’t require writers”
Texting abbreviations
The phrase “ripped from the headlines”
Losing in fantasy pools, any sport
The colour “teal”
The use of the word “ho” to denote anything but a garden tool
Fake watermelon smell
“Hipster” anything
Wet jean hems that NEVER DRY
Corndogs
The return of the 80’s to fashion
And finally…
People who hassle single people about Valentine’s Day because it’s supposed to be depressing. What? No, keep your carnations.
I’m alllll good, G.
February 14th, 2008 at 3:08 pm
I fear your snarkiness on this issue deserves a bit of smackdown, Megstar.
I shall rip something from the headlines for you to read whilst I chomp this corndog on my walk with my hipster friends down South Main (which is really the North end, go figure).
Here, pat pat pat, let me give you a hug and buy you some nice carnations.
February 14th, 2008 at 3:10 pm
oh - something i can add to your list… blogs that require “comments awaiting moderation”
February 14th, 2008 at 4:01 pm
i am good on that list with the exception of carnations and corndogs. :)
February 14th, 2008 at 4:24 pm
Oh how I hate the term baby bump. Glad to know it’s not just me.
February 14th, 2008 at 4:37 pm
I can’t believe there’s such a thing as banana flavored gum. Just the thought of it gives me that gross feeling in the back of my throat.
February 14th, 2008 at 5:45 pm
I’d like to add - words that people start using everyday and think its cool, after it appears in some stupid song by no-talent rap-pop singers! Like ‘My Humps, my lady lumps’ or something dumb like that!
February 14th, 2008 at 7:01 pm
YES! Thank you! You and Superfantastic both! I can’t STAND the use of the word “Bump” to describe a woman’s pregnant belly! I’m also agreeing with Roshan, but more because I find that song irritating, although I Laughed Out Loud, ’cause I couldn’t believe they actually called them “lady lumps”.
February 14th, 2008 at 9:05 pm
I hate the word “ho” period. Hoe is a whole other subject. Hoes are quite useful actually, if you’re into gardening. Which I haven’t done in at least a dozen years. And the word homonym somewhat bothers me as well.
Other than that small [oh god, I hate it when I forget the word I’m about to type], I agree with the rest of your list except corndogs, which I enjoy *on occasion*.
February 15th, 2008 at 11:06 am
How about:
Carnation Evaporated Milk?
Sniffling constants?
Down with smack?
Patch Adams?
Patty-cake, patty-cake, baker’s man?
Banana-flavored rum?
Blue eye in dogs in photos?
And most importantly, reality blogging that “doesn’t require writers?”
February 15th, 2008 at 12:12 pm
Hmmmm…. things I hate?
Cheese
Chinese food
Celery
Rainy days
Pushy panhandlers
Idiotic people
Bureaucracy and red-tape
People who aren’t flexible
People who only follow rules
Stubbornness without respect
Improper attribution of ideas
Drivers in Vancouver (generally speaking)
Politician’s lies
People who talk out of their … pretending they know something they don’t
My upstairs neighbours
… and their kid
… and his tantrums
… and their callousness and lack of respect for my and my next-door-neighbour’s sleeping patterns
Telemarketers
Arriving late
Having lost my cell phone
Sleep deprivation
When someone stands me up
When someone changes pre-existing plans without consulting with me first (and those are our plans)
Not being able to blog when I want to
Not having good ideas to blog about
Self-pompous people who think they’re all that and a bag of chips
WOW - Meg, never in my life had I ever sat down and thought about what I hated. Thanks for this opportunity!
PS - I actually do hate the idea that nobody would be interested in reading my blog!
February 15th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
- car repairs
- the expression “my bad”
- John Steinbeck novels. Joseph Conrad too, if truth be told. Really, does life have to be that bleak?
- That upward inflection at the end of sentences of a younger generation (the name of which I know not) that turns all their statements into questions?
- cyclists that seem intent on throwing themselves under the wheels of my car. Don’t get me wrong, I love cycling but there are road rules for cyclists too. Live by them and live.
- when people try to do mental math during a meeting. I’m all for knowing how to do it, I just don’t want to be held up while I wait for you. Have your answer written down before the meeting.
- Gwyneth Paltrow, Renee Zellwegger and Mary Louise Parker. I’m sorry, it had to be said. They do weird things with their voices that bug me.
- people who say “We really have to lunch” when they don’t mean it
Hey, that was fun!
February 15th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
I agree with nearly everything on your list, especially dried-out baked goods. That is not muffin, Starbucks, it’s a rock.
February 15th, 2008 at 2:21 pm
Ok, Meg - here’s the link love :) I came up with a few things that I hated after posting my comment :)
http://hummingbird604.blogspot.com/2008/02/things-i-hate-most.html
All the best!
February 15th, 2008 at 5:27 pm
When people scrape the bottom of their yogurt containers somewhere around 5 times per second. That drives me crazy.
When people leave spilled coffee or coffee rings on the office kitchen counter. Would they do that at home?
People who won’t move upstairs on the train so that more of us can fit.
over use of the word apparently.
That I live in an area I really dislike and can’t find the opportunity that would allow me to move.