You are currently browsing comments. If you would like to return to the full story, you can read the full entry here: “five things that are NOT true of love. and five that ARE.”.
meg fowler tripp dot com
You are currently browsing comments. If you would like to return to the full story, you can read the full entry here: “five things that are NOT true of love. and five that ARE.”.
I think you are right on the money. This is an awesome post!
Found you by way of Gruen.
100%, completely, exactly, perfectly well said.
Well said, especially for such a young pup!
If I had a nickel for every time I was told that it would happen when I least expect it/stop looking, I do believe I’d have a new car by now. By far, my worst experience with this was when a married guy expressed this to me and an entire table full of single girls. At a wedding. Then we killed him.
I was also once the victim of a “He’s perfect for you!” set up. All we had in common was that we were single. It turned out that the guy had a thing for my friend, so she and her boyfriend wanted him dating someone, anyone, ASAP so he’d leave her alone. It was not an honor to be chosen.
All of that to say: Yes. I concur. Preach it, sister.
Well, I am just going through a breakup myself, with the guy I was supposed to marry in August, so I hope everything you said here applies to me too :) I’m currently grappling with the idea that I’m single again after 4 years of being attached to a guy I was SURE about, and now I think all my ideas about how love works are based on a rather shaky foundation. I’m not sure I’ll ever find anyone again, but I hope I do.
I’m a proud member of The Club For Single People Looking To Meet Other Single People Doing Quirky and Interesting Activities! You should totally join! (We mainly just twitter and eat pie all day.)
Meg this is all so true. I especially agree with #3.
I was definitely looking for love when I found it — it’s still in the beginning stages but it’s rather wonderful, and I am going to keep all of these points in mind as we go along. I don’t think most people who look at us would think we have a “perfect” relationship (more likely: what on earth are they doing together?), but like you pointed out in #5, none of the obvious things are what make love work.
I was heartbroken in 2003, by someone who sucks so much it’s not even funny. At the time that we dated, everyone BUT me thought this person sucked big time. At the time, I was TOTALLY AND ABSOLUTELY IN LOVE. I had the best, most amazing and fantastic partner, in my view. I think it takes time to recover from a really bad breakup.
Right now, I’m in a ‘situationship’ (see my blog or Urban Dictionary for definitions) and I am quite content. I feel very loved, I love and have a chance to enjoy many of the things I used to enjoy when I had a partner.
I concur with everything you’ve said, I just wish I could write it up in a more coherent way than what I just did. But for that, we got YOU. I love your blog, Meg Fowler.
I think you’re amazing, as a human, as a communicator…I’ve not read something on this so articulate, humorous and painfully true in all my years. And yes…I’m a 52 year old, mother of three grown childrena and a Nana to one fantastic little man who finds you delightful.
Love is not love which alters when it alteration finds, or bends with the remover to remove:
O no!
i’m a firm believer in “que sera sera” and doing whatever makes you happy until then.
can’t say i share you optimism but sometimes, i really wish i did.
Love is not rocket science…although there is chemistry involved. Keeping that chemistry part of the magic takes hard work. Love is about ‘want to’s’ not ‘shoulds’. It’s your heart’s desires that motivate you act lovingly. Sometimes getting your head out of the way and letting your heart take over is half the battle because kindness comes from the heart.
Finding someone smarter than you might be only thing I might question…you’re brilliant! :)
I think this is Demonstration # 322 of your brilliance, Meg. Awesome post, and timely. Thanks.
Did you live in my head and decided to live a life of your own? This is exactly how I feel!
You are a fun read Meg, no doubt. As someone who was single for 32 years (and by the way, I learned to love being single and I encourage anyone I know that is single to enjoy it and enjoy the freedom that comes along with it to do so many things that become a little more difficult once you’re married and/or have kids and/or have a mortgage that can choke a horse.
Having said that, point number five is the one point where part ways – kinda. The fact is, you haven’t found the right one yet! It doesn’t have to be like NEO. It just has to be the right person that you have the right connection with.
Further, what your friend said about having a husband that is so patient because she’s such a bitch is true too! Not because she’s such a bitch (certainly I’ve met enough people that think they’re the poster-Bitch and let me tell you – they ain’t!) or because he’s extremely patient – but because one of the keys to a long lasting relationship is that you have enough love (and knowledge of your flaws to give you grace) to forbear the failings of your loved one. Sure, we all need to work at getting better – but the old advice that was given to me before I got married sure still holds value: Before you’re married, keep your eyes wide open. After you’re married keep your eyes half closed ;)
Now don’t worry, I know that when you put yourself out there that people will see your confidence because you do love who you are. You’ll find the right one (probably on a date with something else) and you’ll know it because you’ll fit hand in glove.
Shalom!
you expressed in this post exactly what I’ve wanted to say to people for months. You rock, Meg.
I just wanted to thank you for posting these thoughts. I am in a bit of relationship turmoil right now, and reading this really helped me – just when I most needed to think something positive about “love”, there it was.
Also: I just think you are such the loveliest person, inside and out!
Well said. There is some lucky guy out there just waiting to be found.
These people really think they are helping you because of a perceived flaw in you (being single). When my ex-husband and I split up several years ago I got all of these same cliche’s thrown at me. I could tell the people thought they were being helpful but it pissed me off. I even had several not-so-close friends offer to fix me up. That offended me because 1) I didn’t ask for help and 2) I didn’t need help. None of these people even knew what qualities I looked for in a man so how could they begin to fix me up with anyone? I’ve never talked about my love-life at all with these people. There’s no more talk of dating but now there’s some talk of my biological clock. Is nothing out of bounds for other people to talk about? Well meaning or not, some things are off limits.