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meg fowler tripp dot com
You are currently browsing comments. If you would like to return to the full story, you can read the full entry here: “how to be your own albatross in a thousand easy lessons.”.
Meg,
Thank you, thank you, thank you for your honesty. I have been feeling so much like this lately – especially the not living up to my potential and using excuses like air parts. It’s extremely comforting to know I’m not alone.
You are more fabulous than you realize and I’m sure my fellow internet people would be happy to attest to that.
Anna
Amen. Brilliant. You rock.
Thank you so much for sharing that. I’m another person who has been feeling the same way as well. It was so encouraging to know that I’m not the only one who has been selling myself short all these years.
I’ve been making excuses about not following through with my dreams and passions for ages. I love my job, but it’s not where my passions lie. I know this. I know what it would take to get me where I want to go, but I’ve been so scared to pursue this. I knew when I was 10 years old where I wanted to end up in life, and I’m not there yet. I know the opportunities are out there, but I have not pursued them.
Thank you for the kick in the butt. I definitely needed it.
Wow. That was really amazing to read, Meg. Very inspiring. Where did all of this come from? Like, what led to you to saying, “Enough!” ? Anything specific, or just all of it together?
I think you’re really strong and brave for putting yourself out there like this. It’s one thing to face this in the privacy of your own head, it’s quite another to wrestle with in in such a public way. Believe me: I know. :)
I’m in your cheering section, lady. Can you hear me?
“Not quite the natural product of my own potential. Not quite the woman or daughter or friend I intended to be.
Just… not quite.”
Unreal. That’s when the tears started because so much of your story is similar to mine and those three sentences just sum it all up.
I was sobbing by the end. Bravo Meg! This post is an inspiration. And, your picture is adorable.
Absolutely amazing, you are.
Wow. Just wow.
I am so proud of you for this. Not for writing it, though I’m proud of you for that too. For thinking it.
I love where you’re going.
Meggy, my dear dear girl. That is the most beautiful honest raw thing you have ever written and I love you more than ever for it. My heart is shouting “me too me too” in so many ways…and I am also at the jumping off point of choosing to live up to my potential rather than “down to others expectations”. But…this is about you…and you are amazing. You look beautiful. Its nice to see you really smile.
What a fine mind.
Harness your desire. It can take you anywhere.
doug
I’ve been living in the not quite for far too long as well. I’ll look forward to reading about your transition out of it. You’re an inspiration.
You are phenomenal. Thanks for writing this, for being utterly accurate in airing your introspections.
And I think you have a lovely smile.
WOW
A friend referred me to your site a few weeks ago and I would be remise if I didn’t comment as tears welt up in my eyes.
It takes a very strong person to take the time to stop and be conscious of who they are. Keep in mind that many do not go there in their lifetime.
I noticed patterns in my life that I knew I needed to change in mid 20s. A decade later and it is still a work in progress Once you see results it all comes easily, as you WILL see.
Thanks for your honesty.
“There was no greater virtue than self-sacrifice, even if I was really doing it to make myself feel valuable.” ~ That’s the ticket, right there! Bowing to everyone else’s needs so that they value you. It is very frightening to finally stop doing that and come to the decision that either your ‘friends’ will value you for who you are rather than what you can do for them, or they won’t. It’s the ‘or they won’t’ part that can be so scary. These people that you have built a life around, what if they aren’t there when you quit catering to them and their needs? It’s a scary thing to place enough value in yourself that you are alright to let those people go, if that’s what they decide to do.
“….But I let them do it, so I really couldn’t blame anyone but myself.” I disagree with you here. Absolutely you have to take some responsibility, but I do not believe for one second that those people didn’t do/say things to you because they figured they could. They KNEW that you would still bend over backward to make them happy. There are some mean, misguided people in the world, and just because they took advantage of your good, big heart, doesn’t mean that you are at fault.
I absolutely heard the frustrated, innocent Meg in this writing. She’s on her way out to greet the world. I can’t wait to see how she meshes in with the wonderful, sparkly, funny Meg that is already here.
Good job, sweetheart! I think the snowball moved about 18 feet with that one shove!
Kudos on your honesty. You’ll get to where you want to be, and this is a fantastic first step.
BTW, LOVE your full name! I did a mental Stacy Londonesque, “Shut UP!” when I read it.
And perfect teeth are an overrated thing. You have a lovely smile that lights up your whole face and takes off a good 6-7 years, and you can’t get that with braces.
Well, then….
You know, there is a black and white photo you once had up there in which you have a wide open smile (I think I referred to it as your Janis Joplin shot in some comment–there is a lot of big jewelry involved as I recall). That one is my absolute favorite. An entirely wide open portrait.
Meg, I admire your courage and I’m jealous of your writing.
if i were brave enough to admit all these feelings in myself, let alone write about them with such raw honesty, i could have saved myself two wasted years and tons of money in therapy. i’m still not where i want to be…i’m sort of sitting back waiting for it to just happen, though i fear it never will. good luck to you, meg…you are an inspiration. keep smiling…it suits you.
Just for the record, your smile is gorgeous. I also love how the shot shows your entire face, because it is just glowing and beautiful. Don’t let the you that tells yourself you aren’t enough to derail the 10 year old phenom that is trying to push through!
Before I read this, I saw your current picture and I thought “what a pretty smile.” No lie.
I love crooked teeth. I think they’re so much more interesting and real than straight ones. I wish I hadn’t gotten braces when I was in high school.
That was a very brave thing to write. As one of those non-cons you talk about, I can identify with some of what you said, and I’ve certainly made enough bad choices in my life, based on low expectations for myself, to fill a book. Thankfully, after years of accepting loneliness and misery, I allowed myself to be happy, and found someone good to share it with.
I’d say good luck, but luck isn’t what’s required. So I’ll say good strength of commitment!
Go for it, Meg!
Meg, this post made me cry because it so deeply resonates with how I feel about myself most of the time. Thank you for ‘coming out’, for sharing your deep truths, for allowing me to see these things within myself, for inspiring me to change too. You ARE beautiful and strong.
Wow. If you could get out of my head, that would be super. I don’t like seeing you write about me when I don’t feel comfortable doing it.
Especially this part.
[b]If a man rejected me, I believed the next one would, too. It doesn’t matter why any of them let me go or if they were, in reality, the worst matches for me on the planet. What mattered was my inability to be what they needed me to be.
I’d mysteriously started gaining weight in my teens after being a tiny underweight sprite of an athlete, and I couldn’t really make it go away. I’d find out later why, but the whys made no difference.
And the more those kinds of rejection happened, the more I see it as a pattern and not just a series of random experiences. I even made jokes about it when I would emcee my friends’ weddings. I think back to those speeches now, and I want to cry.
Also, if a friend was angry at me, it meant she would stay that way. It wouldn’t matter if her anger was undeserved or short-term or even real… after all, I could easily invent frustrations for people that they weren’t experiencing. I simply expected them to be disappointed in me.[/b]
yeah. Stop that.
Hugs (to you and me and everyone like us)
gail
I’m behind in my blog-reading and just caught up on this post now and I was so moved by it. You have such an objective grasp on the state of your heart and the choices you’ve made and being able to see things so clearly will help you go where you want to. I love your smile, Meg. It is brave and beautiful, just like you.
Oh man, I hope I am not one of your “utterly toxic friends!”
What a great post, Meg. I know it must have been very hard for you to post. Your honesty is inspiring.
Sending all my warm thoughts through the miles. Nancy
Hang on for the journey of your life. I started my own transformation about 7 years ago. It’s a work in progress. I’m getting better, but still go back for those anxiety binges (chocolate has help me over come some of that). And, it’s worth the trip. Some of the best things ever have come about through those tough times.
From one crooked-toothed girl to another: I can’t wait to see what’s up next for you.
I love you, Meg. You’re inspiring.
You have an absolutely beautiful smile. Thank you for smiling for us! You also have a beautiful honesty and humility– and you’re right: from here it gets good! God bless you and help you on your journey.
This is beautiful! As are you. Beauty can only be held back for so long and then? It breaks through and infects and affects anyone near it. Thanks for being strong enough to share this with us.
Meg, you’re beautiful, of that i’m sure. And strong and brave and inspiring, talented, funny and more! You are more than you know; you affect people with your wit, your writing and honesty, total strangers like me feel a bond with you. I’ve learned so much reading your blog and can identify with alot of what you say even if i am quite a bit older than you. I wish i had been as wise as you are when i was your age. I think you’re great and i wish you happiness, health and success in all you do.
You have a lovely smile, you know?
oh, my love for you runs deep, baby. really, really deep. xoxo
Meg,
This is a gorgeous, honest, amazingly poetic post.
Sounds like you will go far in my opinion. You have everything it takes and then some to be the next superhero. :)