the only thing to fear is fear itself… and butterflies.
I don’t know why I’m so scared of butterflies.
But I always have been. When I look at one of those giant, fluttering beasts, all I can see is a hairy man in a dress.
I mean, sure — pretty wings.
But have you NOTICED the giant thing the wings are ATTACHED to? Good heavens.
I’m pretty sure it’s an irrational fear, but I claim it, nonetheless.
Along with my claustrophobia, my need to re-lock doors, my issues with touching styrofoam after I’ve filed my nails, my horror of the smell of microwave popcorn, my rampant disdain for brie cheese, and my problems with attempting to wear shoes all day (and not kicking them off and out a window.)
Is that not the oddest selection of deeply-rooted concerns EVER?
The claustrophobia and the door-locking ALONE are contradictory.
But since when are fears supposed to make sense?
Everyone I know has fears they can’t explain.
My friend Ashleigh can’t handle seeing anyone else’s hair left on a surface in her home. Now, sure… you could argue that this just points to obsessive cleanliness. And the fact that hair is kind of icky once it leaves our bodies.
But the lengths to which Ash will go to avoid the hair of others (gloves, bleach, refusing to use other peoples’ showers)?
Straight down Irrational Lane.
My roommate Catherine won’t go put anything in our garbage cans after dark because she fears encountering a skunk. And sure — that’s a pretty normal fear. No one wants to get sprayed, right?
But when you tie it into the fact that you can’t talk about skunks (or rodents, or most small animals that are not dog, cat, or bunny) without Catherine feeling sick to her stomach?
Yeah. A bit more edgy.
My friend Shawna could never handle wool touching her skin — not because it was itchy, but because she was convinced that she was allergic to sheep. She had no evidence of this, but I know that she once began to cry when she saw a lamb chop in my shopping cart.
Loony.
John at my office fears balloons and cows. My director, Christina, fears construction rebar, and things falling on her head.
And a guy I dated once felt shivers up his spine if he saw anyone else brush their teeth.
So.
What are you afraid of? What are your freaky phobias? And I’m not talking fear of abandonment here (this is not a therapy group… and if it is, OH MY GOSH I HAVE THINGS TO SHARE) but the goofy things that make our friends point and laugh.
Do tell!
November 13th, 2006 at 5:50 pm
Just your normal everyday fear of heights — well, and steps, especially going down them. I attribute it to the fact that my older sister was carrying me down the steps when she tripped and fell down the steps with me. She landed on my leg and broke it. I have no memory of this because I was only 18 months old, but it plays out in recurring dreams and an obsessive need to hold on to the handrails when I’m going down stairs. Whew!
November 13th, 2006 at 5:51 pm
1) Science
2) Cake
3) The twenty-five year service plaque in “Bill’s” office. I keep seeing it, Scrooge-like, with MY name on it.
4) Math
In that order.
November 13th, 2006 at 6:09 pm
Ack! I don’t like math or cake either!
November 13th, 2006 at 6:21 pm
Well, I hate letting other people watch me brush my teeth and I can’t stand watching people brush theirs but I’m not sure that is a fear, per se, more of a pet peeve. I guess I have no irrational fears, really. I check my curling iron/clothes iron/stove several times before I leave the house every day but that is because I have caused several small fires. I don’t fear the dark, spiders, public speaking, dieing alone. Nothing.
Wow, you just kinda made my day. I’m more grounded than I thought.
November 13th, 2006 at 6:28 pm
Cake? How can anyone not like cake?!
Hmmm. I used to be terrified of flying, but I kicked that (with the help of valium and vodka).
Nothing else comes to mind. I will have to think about it.
November 13th, 2006 at 8:03 pm
I always notice when someone goes to the washroom and comes out too quickly. I’m paranoid that they didn’t wash their hands. On the germ note, I need to use paper towels to open the door to leave a washroom (public). I also have to flush with my foot.
Other than that, I’m fear free, I guess. I have lots of annoyances, so if you want to talk about that… oh. my. gosh.
On a slightly related note, I once worked for a company who had about 30 employees and none of us were “allowed” to eat popcorn in the building because the owner couldn’t stand the smell.
November 13th, 2006 at 10:04 pm
i HATE seeing anyone cut their nails with clippers or floss their teeth. for starters…..
November 13th, 2006 at 10:41 pm
i also can’t stand watching or hearing others brush their teeth. i cannot stand chalk boards…not just nails upon one, but also the sound and thought of writing with chalk or an eraser wiping it off - erg…i have shivers and a knot in my stomach right now. i agree with popcorn - i hate the smell of it and abhor the sound when people eat it. hair skeeves me out, more specifically when others’ hairs fall out and i find them on me or in my space. i have recurring dreams about bathrooms…these are not just regular bathrooms, but ones in which the toilets are oddly shaped and filthy, and i am required to perch perilously upon said toilets (strangely there are often other people around i am trying to avoid and frequently i am barefoot) in order to use them… and i HAVE talked about these toilet dreams in therapy and still have them, go figure. i freak out when i get food on my hands and take great care to eat finger foods with only the most delicate tips of thumb and pointer, lest i accidently drip on my palm or other digits. i don’t know if these qualify as fears, maybe they are more along the lines of ocd tendencies… i have many more, but i will save them for my therapist.
November 14th, 2006 at 12:30 am
Getting into bed without washing my feet..eeuuww- unless I have slipped a disc recently. (Though I have gotten around that in the past by dropping a clean damp wash cloth on the floor, washed one foot with the other using afore mentioned cloth and then dragging besmurched cloth to laundry and tossed it in the hamper with an accurate foot toss.) That puts the quirk on the back burner. But at least I don’t have to check to see if the stove is still on!…do I??
November 14th, 2006 at 5:23 am
I’m a bit of a germaphobe.
November 14th, 2006 at 7:23 am
Ice. Not, like, cubes or anything, but I cannot walk on any ice. If my driveway is iced, it takes me a good 20 minutes to walk to my car.
Which is unfortunate, since I live in a place that has 6 months of winter.
So yeah. Ice. And Ketchup.
November 14th, 2006 at 9:31 am
I am completely irrationally afraid of cockroaches. They don’t DO anything to you. But they’re huge (everything IS bigger in Texas as it turns out) and they move unnaturally quickly. I’m normally not that much of a girly girl but I scream and run when I see a roach.
I’m not afraid of the gecko lizards we have that are the same size and move just as fast. Actually I LOVE them because they eat the roaches. Maybe it’s because they’re small for lizards but cockroaches are disgustingly large for bugs.
November 14th, 2006 at 9:54 am
I find that any large bug is all terror, all the time. I once got a clackety junebug caught in my hair, and I nearly passed out from the gnarly horror of it all. Gah!
November 14th, 2006 at 9:58 am
Liz is my soul sister. The smell of popcorn at the office makes me feel like I am choking. At the movies, it is just fine. And the toilet dreams - I am with her there, too.
I fear snow. The thought of being where it is snowing…eeech. It makes my palms sweat. The last time it snowed on me (which was the first time in over 20 years) it was just a tiny flurry, but I woke Mr Stapler up yelling “We have got to get out of here! It is SNOWING!!”
But on the other hand I grab washroom door handles barehanded with no fear. Go figure.
November 14th, 2006 at 12:47 pm
I’m terrified to fly, and when I’ve been drinking & the next day I wake up hungover & I have to fly within a month’s time & I think about it, I actually get all sweaty with fear. It’s like the alcohol in my body induces an axiety attack…which I’m also scared of.
November 14th, 2006 at 5:17 pm
I take huge issue when I encounter something that has little things inside it. It is so hard to explain so here are some pictures that make me what to vomit.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/spiderbrigade/297056022/
http://www.indexstock.com/store/Chubby.asp?ImageNumber=359339a
The second made me cry a little.
November 15th, 2006 at 12:05 am
I would like to point out that I am not exactly afraid of things falling on my head. Well, not any more than any other sane person is afraid of things falling on their head — I mean, one hardly can relish the thought of things falling on one’s head.
But I believe what you are referring to is my hatred of slimy objects dangling over my head, which has been known to cause glee among some cowokers when they find slimy things specificaly to dangle them above my head. Like the disgusting slimy children’s toys we refer to as “mucus creatures”. And I would like to point out that while mucus creatures USED to make me stomp my feet and jump up and down with RAGE, I was never AFRAID of them. And I’ll have you know that I have had a mucus octopus dangling over my head for nigh on 6 months now and I hardly ever give it a second thought. Mostly.
The rebar still terrifies me, though.
And San Francisco was fun, :)
November 16th, 2006 at 12:08 pm
I’m afraid of germs on anything (so yo know i’m always washing my hands), heights, water (Oceans, lakes, pools and hot tubs, not bathtubs and showers)and mold (it has the most germs!)