But Mr. Reynolds didn’t look THIS good at the time:
Now, I don’t know if it’s because I grew up with an impeccably-groomed father, but I can’t quite get why men are so afraid of wearing suits. At least five of my male friends have bitched in my proximity about suits lately. FIVE. And I don’t want to hear it anymore!
SUITS ARE NOT OF THE DEVIL.
I LOVE MEN IN SUITS.
Seriously.
Woo!
Suits don’t make you look stiff. Does he look stiff? NO. He looks elegant. And not just because he’s all tall and slim and well-dressed. Because he’s carrying himself with pride.
Suits are not supposed to be uncomfortable. If you’re uncomfortable, you’re in the wrong damn suit.
And no, suits don’t make you look like your dad or a salesman, unless you GOT the suit from your dad or you ARE a salesman.
And NO, SUITS ARE NOT DESIGNED TO ROB YOU OF YOUR INDIVIDUALITY. Do you know how many combinations of styles, colours, cuts, fabrics, and looks you can put together? You can look like you! You can feel like you… only slightly more put together for the right occasion.
My only quibble with Mr. Reynolds here is that… well, he stars in crap movies. That, and his pants are a bit short. I don’t know if that’s even a shade of wool I really like, but there’s something about it that works.
Here’s my firm belief: Every man should have at least one decent suit!
Everyone will go to a funeral or a wedding or a court case or a really good restaurant at some point in their lives.
Why be a schmuck about dressing for it? SO….
MEG’S RULES FOR MEN WHO WANT TO DRESS UP AND IMPRESS THE MEG
- Cheap suits will always feel cheap, unless you’re just getting a really decent suit on sale. Linen is tough to keep looking fresh, but wool (summer weight or otherwise) is always a good bet. I wouldn’t even go for a blend. Stick with a single fiber unless you buy a lot of suits or sportcoats and trousers.
- DON’T BUY A COLOURFUL SUIT. Leave the sage and the burgundy and the odd blues, etc. for Vegas entertainers and car salesmen. Most men will get the most wear (and look the best) in a navy, gray, black, or tan suit. Brown is pretty damn tough to rock, though, regardless of the neutrality of the shade, so proceed with caution. Note: pinstripes can be pretty damn hot with charcoal or navy suits. Huzzah!
- Double-breasted suits make most men look like mafia kingpins or OJ Simpson lawyers. If you’re an OJ lawyer, SHAME. If you want to wear one anyway, don’t do up all the buttons, for the love of Pete. You look trussed! A nice two- or three-button suit is your best bet for comfort and elegance.
- If you are crazy skinny, you can wear pleats in your suit pants. Otherwise, they will bunch up like you’re wearing an adult diaper. And if you’re wearing an adult diaper, well, ok. I just want you to be comfy. Wear whatever you want.
- The whole matching-tie-and-shirt thing is a bit Regis. Monochomatic is always a good idea for looking sleek, but this vibe has been done, done, and done again. If you can’t match anything, your best bets are a white or light-blue shirt (oxford cloth or any quality cotton fabric, NO POLYESTER) with a nice tie. Leave patterns and stripes for later on in your fashion progression. And nothing shiny (except perhaps the sheen of the silk in your tie.) A shiny shirt is good for ballroom dancing competition, being David Copperfield and NOTHING else. And even HE should make himself disappear.
- Novelty ties are about the most un-novel things on the planet. I don’t trust men in funny ties. I assume they are assassins. Get a solid colour, a stripe, or a pattern that doesn’t make people have seizures if they catch a glimpse of you across a room.
- Your pants need to be long enough. Your pants need to be long enough. Your pants should not be too long. Your pants should not be too long. I said both things twice because they are IMPORTANT. Cuff or no cuff? I don’t care. But your pants should break or bend at the seam about 3/4 of the way down your leg. That means that they rest gently on the tops of your shoes without flooding them.
- Get a jacket that fits you comfortably, and with sleeves that you can bend your arms in and shoulders that you can move in. Too big, and you’ll be floating. In fact, you’ll look like you’re wearing Dad’s suit. Which you might be, actually. Too small, and you’re the bassist for a neo-new wave band. Which is fine. But unless you’re doing New Order covers, loosen up!
- Your shirt collar should let you run a finger comfortably underneath, all the way around your neck. No portion of neck should bunch over your collar. OW.
- Novelty socks are for assassins. Patterns are fine. WHITE SOCKS ARE NOT. Keep your feet low key, and for the love of everything that is good and holy, wear a decent lace up or slip on shoe in leather (or decent faux leather for the PETA peeps.) If your shoes are a mess, shine them up, or get someone to do it for you. Nothing ruins a nice look like missing those little details. Wear a belt that coordinates — or simply doesn’t clash — and you’re set.
And finally?
The only way to know what really looks good on you is to go try things on. In a reputable shop. With an actual man with an actual tape measure standing around to help you out.
Did you hear me? GET YOUR SUIT TAILORED. Seriously. It’s just a few more bucks, and you end up looking like a MILLION bucks.
If you don’t know where to go, ask people who look good (in your office, on the street, at the opera, at the hockey game, on the bus, wherever) where they go to shop, or who does their alterations. Not only will you flatter them (or freak them out horribly, though usually only if you try and touch them), but you’ll get good insider info.
And just to be clear, taking a woman with you is NOT an ironclad guarantee that you will make wise fashion choices. Woman do not have innate style. Women wear gauchos and slouch boots and half-t’s and floral jumpers.
At the end of the day, knowing the basics and getting comfortable with suit-wearing is the only way you’re ever going to stop scoffing about it or feeling like you’ve dressed up as a mortician for Halloween. Then you can start adding the details that make you feel more at ease (NO NOVELTY ITEMS, ASSASSIN) and putting your own finishing touches on everything.
Remember, it’s your body, your face, your hair… everyone’s still going to know it’s you, anyway. And if your clothes are the most prominent thing about your look, you’re probably being worn by THEM anyhow, and not vice versa.
And yes, I understand that different people want to look like different things. Go nuts. Really. Embrace your style. Be mad crazy and fun.
But get a sense of occasion as well. Show people respect in how you carry and present yourself when a certain kind of decorum is what’s called for. A little grace goes a long, long way.
Even the edgiest, most counter-culture boys I know have ended up liking how they looked in a suit that, well… suited them.
Granted, one of those suits was orange, but some rules were made to be broken, right?
Heh. I love irony.
And boys in suits.
(Also? Sticky-uppy boy hair. LOVE THAT. Not the gelled spikes or the Pee-Wee forehead wave, but the product-y swooshitude Mr. Reynolds is pulling off here. MMM.)