megfowler.com

August 23, 2006

25 Things I’ve Seen That You Haven’t.

Filed under: stuff — meg @ 9:58 am
  1. A hamster in a tutu.
  2. Oatmeal wrestling.
  3. A bat flying into a wedding tent and landing on the mother of the bride.
  4. Blood coming out of both of my ears at once.
  5. A man knocked out by a wood-chipper-rejected tree. The last thing he remembered was “the smell of cedar.”
  6. An Easter egg dyed with a 2001 Flushes cube.
  7. Catherine beating the Laundry Spider (R.I.P) with a hammer.
  8. A narcoleptic kitten.
  9. Two men wakeboarding in dresses.
  10. Ten people holding Polident tabs in their mouths until they appeared to be rabid.
  11. 100 children throwing up at approximately the same time.
  12. Me in a dress made entirely of black duct tape.
  13. Suri Cruise! (Just kidding.)
  14. A cow with a glass stomach.
  15. A wishbone that broke perfectly down the middle.
  16. A goldfish with an extra fin.
  17. 220 children doing a cossack dance to Boney M’s “Rasputin.”
  18. A bumblebee trapped in a raspberry.
  19. A man eating 36 consecutive jalepeno peppers, and then weeping (Because I ate 38. WIN!)
  20. 20 ducks attacking a man with a loaf of bread.
  21. A truck going approximately 55 miles an hour, three inches from my head.
  22. Eric.
  23. Me, falling down an escalator.
  24. A swarm of ants attacking a squirrel.
  25. A potato that looked exactly like Walter Cronkite.

7 Responses to “25 Things I’ve Seen That You Haven’t.”

  1. barbie2be Says:

    ok, you got me. those are 25 things that i have never seen.

  2. Jacqui Says:

    I commend you! I truly have not seen any of those things, although my ten-year old self has been attacked by a swarm of ants AND my uncle is narcoleptic. Ah, good times, good times.

  3. desiree Says:

    38 jalepenos. Holy cow girl. I can’t even eat one. I am also not sure that you “saw” yourself fall yourself down an escalator so much as experienced it. Then again, if it were lined with mirrors…

  4. meg Says:

    Oh, I saw it, all right. I replayed it in my mind for years afterwards:).

  5. aka_monty Says:

    I actually HAVE seen oatmeal wrestling and 10 people with polident-rabies.

    I believe it was actually on the same night, even. :)

    But the rest…

  6. Suebob Says:

    38 Jalapenos! You are strong, woman. I saw a guy eat 69 to win a contest one time. But before that, there was major vomitage among contestants who were dropping out along the way.

  7. Chris in VA Says:

    Okay, I’ve been away for 10 days and it’s taking me another 10 to catch up… but I HAVE to ask about this one… (and excuse me if you’ve already answered this question)… but in the item below who has the bread, the man or the ducks?

    20. 20 ducks attacking a man with a loaf of bread.

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