Although I wish it was. It’s just not. I’m clearly not that bright, witty, or structured today. It’s more of a “my brain is a narcoleptic snail” day than a “I can turn the world on with a smile!” day. My brains are scattered like ashes upon the wind, and my body? Yeah.

Stupid body.

Anyhow.

In the interests of discovering something more interesting than the crackle-free connections of my sluggish synapses, I’m going to do a brain dump and hope that a decent post will follow. Then I can delete this one in obvious horror and get on with the show.

It’s like a cleanse. Like a detox. Like a dog sticking my head out the window and blowing my ears back. Like writing about nothing at length just because my mom and dad love me and feel compelled to read it, and also Chuck, because he apparently does, too. Though he is neither my mom, nor my dad. He is a Mukiltean.

So, without any further mumbling:

Unrelated and stupid things (well, not all stupid, but unrelated) things I am thinking about right now (in point form, for efficiency.)

1. My fingertips ache.
2. My coffee has cooled somewhat. And when I say this, I mean that a tiny glacier has formed on the surface. Can someone turn the AC down?
3. Is New Orleans going to get nailed again this year? And can the city handle it twice? Why do people go back to nightmares just because they remember how things were pre-nightmare? How bad does it have to get before the memories don’t sustain your desire to follow through with your choice? How much to we have to lose in order to let go?
4. Why, oh why is Larry King still employed?
5. I wish I could write like David Sedaris or Dorothy Parker or Flannery O’Connor.
6. I need a better conditioner for my ends.
7. Why are there so many visitors coming straight here and NOT commenting?
8. How irritated do you have to be at someone to remove a link to their website from your own website?
9. I wonder if I could find running shoes I would like better than the ones I have now? Nothing freaks me out more than running shoe shopping.
10. I have to find some loonies to do my laundry tonight.
11. Will Luongo really help us this season?
12. Is top-notch hyphenated?
13. There are not enough hard-boiled eggs in my life.
14. I think I would like a) a Lush bath bomb bath; b) the perfect white hoodie; c) a pair of pale pink Havaianas; d) a grilled cheese sandwich; e) a bowl of soup.
15. I will make do with a) no bath; b) my black t-shirt with the coffee blotch; c) my black Havaianas where I ripped off the toe part this morning by tripping off a curb; and d) the aforementioned coffee.
16. “Make do” looks stupid.
17. Why is there a perpetually chapped patch on my lip? It’s like a tiny section of sandpaper.
18. I cannot wrap my mind around perpetual hatred. What would need to happen to me to make that seem like a logical, reasonable option? I assume it’s possible (I know my own darkness), but the thought is fairly horrifying. And why do some people — in the midst of hideousness — choose to doggedly seek out peace? They won’t give up trying to improve things around them, while people within the exact same circumstances choose to act out in hate as though it were the only rational option. People from the same streets and families, even. I am fascinated by the psychology of crisis response. Is that weird?
19. I’m tired of listening to talking heads.
20. CNN is getting tabloidy.
21. John Roberts was better when he was JD Roberts.
22. I don’t own any pink clothes anymore.
23. I’ve never been in warm ocean water.
24. I’m a nutbar.
25. This is the last one.

1. Catherine and I will sing along with pretty much anything.
2. Eric really DOES like coffee that much.
3. Snotty waiters don’t affect the taste of good pasta, fortunately.
4. Canadian television: it’s pretty good!
5. When people visit from California, it’s bound to get ten degrees colder and RAIN. Because apparently that’s what they WANTED.

My earbuds broke. Now it sounds like my iPod is playing through a concrete wall — and only in one ear.

I guess there’s nothing wrong with a fresh set of buds, though. Or should I consider something else? Do you know of the perfect headphone — sleek, unobtrusive, high-functioning?

The only thing I can’t handle is the noise-canceling headphone. It freaks me out a little that I would be so immersed in my soundtrack that I might not know a bus is about to run me over, or that someone is yelling, “THERE IS A BEE ON YOUR BACK. A BEE! ON! YOUR! BACK!”

I’m missing the music, though. I really am.

Which lets me know how much I love it.

So.

1. How many hours in a day are you either directly or indirectly listening to music?
2. How often are you in charge of said music?
3. Do you need music as a part of your day?
4. What band and/or solo artist have you been a fan of for the longest period of time?
5. What three albums could you not do without?
6. What’s the last concert you went to?
7. Name two songs your friends/family associate with you?
8. It’s Karaoke Night. Let’s say you’re the karaoke type. What do you sing?
9. If you could sing/play an instrument like anyone else on earth, who would it be?
10. What musical format do you use most often (CDs, mp3s, vinyl, 8-tracks, live instruments, squeezed cats…)
11. Do you own an iPod or mp3 player of some sort?
12. Do you listen to music when you exercise?
13. And finally… dedicate a song to MegFowler.com!